Dads have a reputation for making their wives roll their eyes a lot.
They can do dumb things, whether they’re telling dad jokes or committing crimes.
These dads are sharing dumb things with their wives when they are pregnant.
Sick stomach.
The dad throws up when he gets nervous. He was puking in a bucket while stroking his wife’s hair during labor. When the baby came out, he threw up all over her.
Fried Chicken and pregnancy don’t get along.
“Apparently eating fried chicken while your wife is giving birth is frowned upon…I hadn’t eaten in like 24 hours, and I am not squeamish. The doctor was not impressed, so I threw it out promptly.” – u/Mr_Drewski
A bad joke.
“I think I was about 8 months pregnant and after many attempts at rolling over in bed, I finally managed it. My husband laughs to himself and announces ‘that she rolls.'” – u/dontwantanaccount
Cocoa butter.
When this wife asked her husband to buy her some cocoa butter, he called her from the store and then said, “I’ve looked in the candy section AND the dairy section. I cannot find the cocoa butter!”
Heated seats.
“My dad had just got a new car when my mum was due to have me and he turned on the heated seats while she was sitting in the passenger seat. She thought her water had broke.” – u/kaianide23
Priorities went wrong.
“When my parents arrived at the hospital to give birth to me, the first thing my dad asked the nurse was ‘where’s the cafeteria?’ My mom was 9 cm dilated.”
Dad jokes.
When his wife was pregnant, this dad started making jokes.
Prego pasta sauce was his first order of business. He thought this was hilarious.
Got spare change?
“I asked my wife if she had any money in her purse for coffee during a contracting in about hour 20 of labor. She let me live. 1st kid. I just shut the hell up on the next two kids. Only spoke when spoken to.” – u/Luder714
Weight loss.
“I was working out like crazy and dropped to 159lbs. My 8-month pregnant wife had just weighed in at 160lbs. I said ‘hey, you weigh more than me!’ Go directly to the doghouse. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200…” – u/SnoutInTheDark
Fried Green Beans.
The husband took his wife’s cravings very seriously. He fried two bags of green beans for dinner because she loved them. She threw it all at him in the shower.
Pizza delivery.
“When my mother was giving birth to me my father ordered a pizza. And after I was born my mom was laying in the bed exhausted and she looks at my dad who with a full mouth asks her if she’d like a slice. She didn’t.” – u/thedailywumbo16
Wheelchair driver.
“When going over bumps, it’s better to back over them than just give the chair a hard push. Sometimes the ‘passenger’ just about falls out. Just about dumped my expectant wife into an elevator.” – u/Oregonguy1954
The bypass.
You would think that her husband would go to the hospital when the water breaks. But not this dad!
He went to Starbucks instead of taking his time. It was a scheduled c-section.
The NFL game.
“Wife giving birth to our 1st kid on a Sunday afternoon in October. Yes, NFL season. While the baby is being delivered, the doctor, nurse, and I all turn around, (at the same time!), to see an exciting play by the Vikings vs the Bears. She still brings it up 18 years later…” – u/sparky88xx
Babysitter.
“My mom was giving birth to me, my dad didn’t have a babysitter to watch my brother so he handed him to a random stranger to watch him at the hospital.” – u/ISaidBitchhhh
Stolen bar of Snickers.
The husband made a grave mistake by eating his wife’s bar of Snickers.
The neighbors could hear the yelling. There is a PSA for husbands. Don’t eat your wife’s favorite snack.
Anatomy report.
“I introduced the nursing staff to the terms ‘crotch fruit’ and ‘sex trophy.’ I would think, working in a delivery ward they would have heard those terms before but noooooooooooooooo. Apparently I had uttered the most offensive thing they had ever heard while my wife was giving birth.” – u/rottinguy
It’s a bumpy ride.
“When my wife was in labor with my first kid I took the absolute worst possible route to get to the birthing center. Construction, dips, and potholes in the road. Every bump made her want to tear my throat out. It was horrible for her. We laugh about it now.” – u/strange-brew
Pub crawl.
Father thought he had enough time before his son was born. He went to the pub to get a beer and a bite to eat. His wife called him and told him that the baby was coming second.
