Parents hold a special bond with their newborn baby. It is a very priceless moment to see your baby born. One husband was totally broke when his wife asked him to step out of the delivery room just before birth.
Even after a few months, he is still feeling so hurt and anguish that he does not want to have a date night with her. And also he wants to share that she devastated him. Only because his wife decided she didn’t want him to “see her like that.”
The dad explained that right before the birth of his daughter, his wife banished him from the delivery room.
Three months ago, the dad-to-be was so impatient on the birth of his daughter. But he further explained the situation being which went unplanned according to them. He wrote –
“I was always looking forward to witness her birth. My wife and I agreed that it would be an exclusive moment between us. We talked about it for months.”
Don’t know what made her change of heart. He continued-
“Just before she was about to deliver, she told me that she didn’t want me there,”
Despite his disappointment, she insisted that she didn’t want him to see her “like that.”
“I told her it’d be alright, she asked the nurse to kick me out. She wanted her mother there. I ended up missing the most important event in my life. I just cried and sucked it up,” he continued.
This “dad-to-be” husband was devastated that he couldn’t even express himself to anybody. Rather his wife wants to go out for a break from parenting. But he is seriously not in the mood. Despite months have passed, he is still into the moment and doesn’t know how to express his grief to his wife. And in a mood for any so-called date night anymore.
Some people thought this dad was out of line for “seeking revenge” on his wife for expressing how she felt at the moment.
“Birth is a crazy time,” one person commented on the post. “Like you’re pushing a human out of your funny bits. It’s also a medical procedure. A painful, often gross, and embarrassing one. And on top of that, you have all these hormones. Your wife may have changed her decision right there and then. It’s ok for you to feel hurt and disappointed but that’s what you need to talk to her about not wanting to punish her for not letting you be there at a very very difficult time.”
And someone people expressed that they should have one-to-one talk – “I understand you were upset. I totally get that you would want to be at the birth of your child. You’re not the (expletive) for feeling upset. You are however the (expletive) for not communicating your feelings — it’s been 3 months! Why haven’t you spoken to your wife about this? Why are you letting it fester?” the person asked.
“Giving birth is incredibly traumatic, painful, personal, and emotional,” someone else wrote. “It’s her body, and ultimately her decision who gets to see it/be part of it. Obviously you’re entitled to feel hurt that you were excluded, but now you’re taking your feelings out on her without an explanation. That’s pretty childish.”
But other people thought his wife had broken her promise and this dad deserved more.
As being the dad you have all the ethicalities of the newborn, One person said – “Especially because this is something you guys talked about, and it’s clearly very important to you.”
“Tell her how you feel about it,” another person advised to the husband. “She is allowed to not let you see her vagina despite you being married.”
“You need to tell her that this decision has damaged your relationship,” someone else wrote. “It sounds like she already has an inkling and is hoping date nights will fix it. They won’t. Therapy might.”
In the end, the dad wrote that he didn’t want to argue about whether he should have been allowed in the delivery room. He further explained –
“She didn’t want me to watch and I didn’t. End of the story. The post is about me telling her the reason for not going on the date.”
But if she stills wants to get out of the house, he’ll recommend that she go out with her friends instead.
“I’ll watch the baby and ask her to go out with her friends for a break,” husband wrote.
